Sunday, August 13, 2006

Big Food, Big Ron, Big Yawns

You will remember this recent post, well would you believe that on Thursday this week I had a conversation with Grand Ron himself, en francais. This was at a hotel near Oxford. Ha ha ha. Very good of him to humour me.

It is pissing down with rain outside - I guess I'd be less happy if it was pissing down inside, and the only thing the telly has to offer is athletics from Goteberg. As a special treat, and probably why I compare the weather to pissing, the BBC have wheeled out St. Paula for us all to admire and worship, and there is lots of pontificating as to why we Brits haven't done very well, and it is yawn-o-rama. For me, the challenge of the day is not to retire into alcoblivion, but then I've had very little to drink over the weekend. I got up this morning only with the intent of finishing last nights curry, mmmm, chicken muglai, bombay aloo, onion bhajhi and a somewhat disappointing cheese naan, although it must be said the rest of it was excellent.

Ah, of course, to finish the athletics coverage, we have to have one of those montages so beloved of BBC Sport, where we take lots of clips of triumph and despair and replay it all to a couple of recent pop records, and everyone sheds a tear or two and feels nice and actually its just a cheap way of wasting time and filling up the schedule with what is in essence a repeat, which will almost certainly be repeated later in the day with the highlights coverage. Utter Bollocks. One of my less favourite things about Aunty Beeb.


Zen Wizard said...

I'm trying to learn British English, by immersion, so I can understand this blog.

It is tough...I wish they would just put a translator on that Google thingie...

tom909 said...

So many things I dislike in such a short post. Athletics, Paula, Indian takeaways, BBC jingles.
Ah but looking back I see something good - I do like Big Ron. What a loss to our football coverage the day they got all PC about Big Ron. Surely it's time to bring him back from the wilderness by now.

Cherrypie said...

Cheese Naan? Yuk!

Zen, don't worry. We native speakers often don't understand what he's talking about either but if you make cooing noises, he seems happy enough x

Zen Wizard said...

(Coooo....Cooo...Coo...Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs....)

First Nations said...

curry turns your poos bright orange.

well it does.

krusty the baker said...

You lot don't really need me round here, do you?

Tom - I'm long since not a great footie fan, but having grown up in the Midlands I can't help but have a slightly warm disposition towards Big Ron, and I too wish he were rehabilitated. After all, despite his unfortunate choice of language, his choice of footballers and promotion of talented footballers would suggest that skin colour is not really a major issue for him.

Chezza - it was.

Zen - surely you mean English? Standard(ish) English. British English there be none, as we all have our quaint dialects and accents. And Geordie too. And (reaching for a lollipop) who doves ya baby?

FN - yours, maybe, not mine. I've checked. Like a dog. Green, if you're interested.

Cherrypie said...

Green? I feel it now

tom909 said...

No, I haven't even had my breakfast yet and I'm thinking about orange and green shite. This would never have happened before the days of the internet. I so want to go back to the days of steam engines and little villae shops.

First Nations said...

there is no going back.


Zen Wizard said...

I had to look up "Geordie."

(That's probably something I should only tell a priest...)

krusty the baker said...

Tom - little village shops? My first Saturday job was in the little village shop. I was doomed to work in the food and grocery industry from the age of (ahem, yes, this is true, god I had a hard upbringing), nine.

Zen - so did I, but that's an inevitable consequence of being sent to public school. I daredn't tell the priest.

bdaqmz - Anglo-American foreign policy. (Who needs that twat Ben Elton when you can come here for cheap and lazy attempts at satire?)

tom909 said...

My brother worked in our village shop delivering bread on a bicycle with a basket thing on the front. So what is your role in the industry now Mr krusty.

bookie the worm said...


I hope you are well. Shame not to see you at my leaving do! You didn't return my voicemail either -was looking forward to hearing your dulcet tones!

I hope you are well. I'll check in again soon!

Bookie - The Worm

krusty the baker said...

Tom - it is far too dark an art that I practise that I should share with you my friend, lest you be tainted by association.

Bookie - new friends welcome, old friends too. At least give us a clue! I don't really do leaving do's do I, let's face it. My form is somewhat suspect...getting ejected from shitty pubs, and sitting for three hours with the appearance of Mr. Monged is not really what the Barcadi Breezer bunch want from their krew, is it? Are you the photo-monger...yes you are, it's registered! Mark some Spankers for me, lovely to hear from you.

Tom - this literati knows far too much. I'm doing a runner.

socxr; Zen's favourite ballgame.